Malaikat Sayap Kapas ..

little angel

Langit tampak pucat & basah..
Tampak tak tidur setelah menangis semalaman..
Tubuhku lunglai seolah tak bernyawa..
Tulang belulangku lunak bak tulang ayam presto..
tak mampu menyangga puluhan kilogram
daging hidup yang membungkusnya..

Mataku mengering, korneaku mengeras..
Seluruh ruang mendadak kosong.. sunyi
Sang waktu enggan merayap..
Dia duduk diam ikut enggan bergerak..

Mendadak..
kepak sayap ribuan gagak hitam membahana di sekelilingku..
Kidung kematian pun mengiring nyaring
diantara keruh & pekatnya langit siang..

Sebentuk malaikat mungil sekelebat menyeruak..
meronta keluar dari buncitnya perutku..
terbang pelan, kemudian meninggi ke arah gumpalan awan putih..
tersenyum sambil melambaikan tangan kecilnya padaku..
berbisik lirih padaku yang mati suri..

“kutunggu Mama di surga..”

Jeritku nyaris tak terdengar..
luruh bersama merahnya darah & putihnya kafan..

– Jakarta, 12 Agustus 2008 –

gambar imut itu dipinjem dari sini

[devieriana]

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When you thought I wasn’t looking

Children_Painting_4

MOMMY…

When you thought I wasn’t looking,…
I saw you hang my first painting on the refrigerator,..
you looked so-so-so proud…
and I immediately wanted to PAINT another one…

When you thought I wasn’t looking,…
I saw you feed a Stray cat, and show your love to the cat…
and from that, I learned that it was GOOD to Be KIND to animals….

When you thought I wasn’t looking,…
I saw you make my Favorite cake for me… and from that I learned,
the LITTLE things can be THE SPECIAL things in life.

When you thought I wasn’t looking,…
I heard you say a Prayer,…
and I knew THERE is GOD I could always TALK TO
and I learned to TRUST in HIM

When you thought I wasn’t looking,…
I saw you make a Meal and take it to a friend who was sick,…
and I Learned that we ALL have to HELP to take CARE of each other…

When you thought I wasn’t looking,…
I saw you give of Your time and money to help people who had nothing…
And I learned that those who have something
SHOULD GIVE to those who don’t…

When you thought I wasn’t looking,…
I saw you take Care of our house and everyone in it…
and I learned that We have to take care of what we are GIVEN.

When you thought I wasn’t looking,…
I saw how you handled your responsibilities, even when you didn’t feel good…
And I learned that I would have to BE RESPONSIBLE when I grow up.

When you thought I wasn’t looking,..
I saw your tears falling down from your eyes,..
And I learned that sometimes things HURT, but it’s all right to CRY…

When you thought I wasn’t looking,…
I saw that you Cared…
And I wanted
to BE EVERYTHING that I could be..

When you thought I wasn’t looking,…
I learned most of life’s lessons that I need to know…
TO BE GOOD and PRODUCTIVE person when I grow up…

When you thought I wasn’t looking,…
I looked at you…
and wanted to say…

“Mommy… Thank you for ALL the THINGS I saw,..

When you thought I wasn’t looking…”

[devieriana]

 

picture taken here

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For my beautiful little angel ..

Dear my beautiful angel..
I never got to see your eyes,
or hold your hand, or hear your cries.

All I have are dreams of you,
those of which, will never come true.
My heart sank the day that I knew,
I would never get to meet you.

I had made plans, and had aspirations,
if only I had a little more patience.
I never thought the Lord would take you
away from me so soon.

But, I’ll never forget that dismal day,
around seven in the evening
The day that I knew something was not right,
and through many tears I would have to fight.

Now, all I do is dream every night,
about what life would have been like.
What if you really had been born?

But all we have a dreams of that,
and all we can do is mourn.
We will not mourn for you though,
because we know you’re where you need to be,
even though it isn’t here with me,

You are my angel baby because God wanted you with Him.
Now, forever with His angels, His praises you will sing.
None of my dreams for you will ever come true,
because of that day God choose to take you.
But, my angel baby you will always be,
in my heart forever, forever a part of me

– dedicated for Okta & husband –

[devieriana]

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Life in Mono

soulmate7
Sedihmu, adalah tangisnya
Gembiramu, adalah suka citanya
Nyamanmu, adalah bahagianya
Jenuhmu, adalah bosannya
Pun penatmu juga lelahnya..

Dua raga, terpasung dalam satu jiwa..
Terayun dalam satu frekuensi rasa yang sama
Ragamu hanya sebatas rupa, namun dia adalah nyawa

Sayang, kau tak ujung percaya
kau anggapnya dusta belaka,
“Pergilah, kau tak tahu apa-apa tentang rasaku!”,
Sedihnya berlumur isak & air mata

Rasa-mu tak sama dengan rasa-nya
Pikir-mu tak sama dengan pikir-nya
Jiwa-mu tak sama dengan jiwa-nya
Karena…

.. hati-mu (ternyata) bukan untuk-nya ..

– Jakarta, 20090405, life in mono –

[devieriana]

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